I have two hands and you have two butt cheeks
Do the math.
I get to touch everyone’s butts that’s the math
(via blondesquats)
(via justlaughinghard)
Pooh, you selfish piece of shit
Jack Dawson… Penniless artist who wins a ticket onto Titanic in 1912, attends a first class dinner, develops a taste for the finer things in life, pockets the Heart of the Ocean, survives the sinking, pawns the diamond, spends the following ten years building his wealth and in 1922 moves to West Egg as Jay Gatsby… Millionaire with a shady past and fear of swimming pools.
IT ALL MAKES SENSE.
Then Inception happens
(via itty-bitty-babe)
(via onlylolgifs)
i’m honestly not sure which fan base should be more angry about this.
(via avengerennerson)
taylor swift has an awards show in an hour when suddenly her dress rips
what does taylor swift do??
taylor swift swiftly tailors
(via avengerennerson)
in first period a girl got dress coded for wearing a tank top with a jacket over it and this scrawny little boy stood up and yelled “OH MY GOD SHE HAS SKIN THE SKIN IS TOO MUCH FOR ME HER SHOULDERS ARE BEAUTIFUL THIS IS TOO MUCH” and the teacher got so annoyed with him that she didn’t get to dress coding her
(via avengerennerson)
(via avengerennerson)
me on my way to steal your man
“In case of an emergency this airplane is designed with 8 exits located around you.”
(via avengerennerson)
(via lolzpicx)
i wish i was a mermaid so i could have a nice shiny tail and a pretty seashell bra and a beautiful voice that i could use to entice cute boys and make them crash their ships and drown at sea so human women could rise as the dominate gender of the land
well that escalated quickly
paige i’m a lesbian why would i entice cute boys where did you think that post was going
(via justlaughinghard)
(via lolzpicx)
